10 Simple Secrets For
Making 2011 Your Happiest Year Yet
By Todd Patkin

7. Forgive someone who has wronged you.
This is the other side of the “forgive yourself” coin. Just as you deserve a break, so do other people. Forgiveness is, at its heart, an act of self-love. If you can’t let go of pain and anger, you can’t be happy.

Living with your anger and resentment is a recipe for misery. For one thing, those two emotions reverberate through your mind and body, setting up toxic thoughts, physical stress, and, yes, illness. And for what? You are the one walking around feeling miserable while the objects of your anger are often totally oblivious to your feelings.

The point? Resolve to forgive someone who has caused you pain. Whether you call or visit an estranged ex-friend or write a letter to a deceased parent, you may find the gesture immensely liberating.

8. Become a giver.
Happiness is not about how much you make; it’s about how much you share. Your income and/or net worth has nothing to do with happiness. How much you give—of your money, your time, your self—does.

Many people know this intellectually; they’ve just never put it into practice. Make this the year you do it. Just give up some of the time you waste in front of the TV or mindlessly surfing the Internet. You’ll find that it’s no sacrifice at all.

9. Take a “baby step” toward finding some faith.
This year, make a conscious effort to think a little bit more about your faith, perhaps check out a few different places of worship, or maybe read a couple of spiritual books. Happy people have a connection to a Higher Power. If you aren’t sure there even is one, make this the year you do some honest exploration.

You don’t have to go to church, temple, or a mosque—but you do need the ability and the willingness to see God’s work in your life. It will change your life and the lives of others. A true relationship with a higher power keeps you from becoming too self-centered and focuses your energy and concerns on the greater community rather than just on you.

10. Make 2011 a year of gratitude.
If you make only one change in 2011, make it this one: Work to be more appreciative in general. According to an August 2010 article in TheDailyBeast.com, a study by a University of California psychology professor found that grateful people are 25 percent happier than those who show no gratitude. For the most part, becoming more grateful just means opening your eyes to the blessings you already have.

Gratitude covers a lot of territory. When you’re grateful for your family, you’ll treat them better. When you’re grateful for talents, you’ll use them. When you’re grateful for your health, you’ll work to maintain it. All of these add up to happiness.

It’s ironic; most of us have everything we need to be happy. The tragedy is we’re sleepwalking through life without really noticing that truth. If we could learn to live with an attitude of gratitude—for our kids, our homes, our friends, our health, the food on our tables—we wouldn’t need to worry about finding happiness. We’d be living it every day.

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Todd Patkin, 45, is the coauthor (along with Dr. Howard Rankin) of the upcoming book, Finding Happiness: One Man’s Quest to Beat Depression and Anxiety and—Finally—Let the Sunshine In. Today, he is an author who enjoys spending time with his incredible wife, their great son, and two dogs. Visit: www.ToddPatkin.com .