How To Turn Difficulties Into Gold

By Neil Millar

If you do something once, people will call it an accident. If you do it twice, they call it a coincidence. But do it a third time and you’ve just proven a natural law. 

~ Grace Hopper

Many people take life at face value. A leak springs up, they fix it. A door falls off the hinges, they fix it. A lawn mower breaks, they fix it or buy a new one.

But did you ever stop to think there might be something more to these happenings than meets the eye?

In the past, I admit, I viewed many things that occurred to me as inconvenient and frustrating—especially if it meant I had to take some sort of action.

It’s also true I never saw events unfolding in my life as having any particular point. They happened, I offered as little response as possible, and never even blinked at the possibility that any event unfolding in my life might have a more significant meaningful.

For a long time I was comfortable with life happening to me and me getting by. But in truth, my comfort had many discomforts. In fact, I was intensely uncomfortable at times.

Over time, I realized that everything that occurs to us actually provides us with opportunity.

How does this work? We can either accept what happens and grow, or resist it. The choice we make determines who we choose to be in that moment. Who we choose to be determines what happens next—whether we move on or get a more intense experience of the same pattern.

Does this mean pain? No, not always. In fact, I was in a city amongst five million people, when I saw someone who helped me slot things into place.

I’d just been through a relationship break-up when I began to see how masterfully life is weaved around us to meet our needs.

Within one week this is what happened to me: first, an old girlfriend from work contacted me through Friends Reunited. Second, I bumped into a girl I dated at college. Then I heard from a childhood sweat heart.

The speed and the synchronicity of this all happening left me flabbergasted. But then something else happened.

In the city a few days later, I lost my bearings and somehow found myself standing outside the Tower of London. It was an awesome day and the sun was shining, so I took in the view. And that was when it happened.

A voice from my past, a haughty, know-it-all voice came up from behind me. She was on her mobile phone, luggage in tow and not caring who knew the stewardess on the flight from New York had been mean to her.

I stepped back and let her pass, my mouth fell open and then I laughed. What in goodness name was going on?

Four people I’d dated within a week had, even if only for a moment, flitted in and out of my life. This had to have some significance.

I had to understand it. A friend, who’d read the Celestine Prophecy and sometime behaved a bit sage-like said, “It’s obvious! You need to take a look at your past relationships. Maybe take note of what you liked and what you didn’t like in each of them, so you can stop making mistakes like your last one.” 

This is exactly what I did. And ever since then, I’ve taken note of things with reoccurring patterns happening.

In terms of building up your awareness and turning your difficulties into gold, there is nothing more worthwhile than becoming aware of the patterns forming in your life.

The quote at the top of this article has much truth in it. I believe when something happens it happens for a reason. If it happens twice I should really start to consider what I must do. If it happens a third time, there is a clear patterns occurring, and if I don’t like the pattern, I need to take action to change it.

TIP: Ask yourself: what is a reoccurring pattern in your life: People pulling out onto the road in front of you and driving slowly, taking wrong turnings, arguments, people complimenting you on something you’re good at and encouraging you to pursue a new career?

If something is regularly occurring or happening, 2-3 times or more in a short space of time, there is a message from the universe for you to take stock of and act upon. Consider the possibilities for what you can do.

Neil Millar, of CommunitySoul, is a global network involving some of the worlds best-selling authors and top coaches in personal growth and development. Put your life on a new level and learn from great minds and share your ideas and experiences along the way. www.communitysoul.co.uk