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by
Connie de Veer, MPA, CPCC What
happened? It was all so clear to me a month ago. I was sure I could be satisfied
at 9pm with half an apple and my last, preciously guarded bread exchange,
patiently watching the poundage drop off at a sensible 1.5 pounds a week, eyes
on the target, firm of resolve; clear of mind. Then, late one afternoon, that
little inner voice says “I WANT COOKIES! No, I mean I REALLY want cookies.
I’m not hungry, I just want cookies…and I want them NOW!” That
firm resolve was so clear and present yesterday is nowhere to be found. I
can’t seem to recall what I thought was so important that I had to deny myself
that simplest of pleasures…cookies and milk. I look in the mirror and say to
myself, “for a middle-aged woman you’re not so bad. Besides, why are you
trying to be a svelte sex-goddess at your age, anyway? You should be secure
enough that you can accept yourself, no matter what size you are.”
(blah-blah-blah!) Can
you relate? This scenario has played itself out in my life more times than I
care to recall. But recently, I finally had enough, and used the skills I use to
coach others to success, to jump start my own weight loss plan and re-boot my
resolve…and it worked! Now I want to spread the news! Here is the weight loss
program I used to get off the diet merry-go-round and lose weight. Weight
Loss Program 1.
Envision Your Goal. If you’re vague about where you’re heading and why you
want it, you won’t get there! So, write out (or, if you hate to journal, speak
it into a recorder, or speak it to a friend who’ll write it down for you), a
beautiful, blissful, perfect, 100% satisfaction, no limits, no negative
self-talk picture of what you want to achieve in your eating habits. Be as
specific as possible, and use as many sensory details as you can come up with.
IMPORTANT NOTE: Make this fun! When you have a clear idea of what you want, the
how-you-get-there piece gets easier and clearer. If your resolve starts to wane,
take this out and read it again. Complete the following statements to stimulate
your thinking: •
I want to feel ___________________ •
I see myself ____________________ •
I am, “having” “being” “doing” _______________________________ 2.
Food Association Journal. Set aside about half an hour for this. Take inventory
of all associations you have with food. Sit down and write it all out. The good,
the bad, and the ugly! Let your unconscious mind and imagination go nuts with
this one. Draw pictures even…if you want to! But get down on paper, every
attitude, belief, opinion, love, and hate that shows up when you think about or
have anything to do with food. Example:
“Food is Mom! The smell of meatloaf, corn, and baked potatoes when I came in
from playing as a kid.” or “Food is bad. It tempts me at every turn and I
have no control over it!” 3.
Values Assessment. Take a look at your Food Association Journal and from it,
pull out as many things you value, deem really important, must have, and love
about food. Write them down. (Bear in mind that when coaches refer to values, we
don’t mean what you think you should think is important, or what someone else
thinks is valuable. Values in this context refer to those things that aren’t
either “right” or “wrong.” Like emotions, they just “are.”) For
example: fresh/colorful/vibrant/nourishing celebratory/social/seasonal
rituals/family. How
will you honor those values on your healthy eating plan? (So you ENJOY this
journey, and don’t feel deprived or “punished!”) 4.
Start And Stick With A Food Journal. Create a plan for what you’re going to
eat, and then write down everything you do eat, even when it deviates from the
straight and narrow path. WRITE IT ALL DOWN! Awareness of a habit is MOST of the
solution. And you might be surprised when you tally up whatever units you’re
counting (calories, fat grams, etc.) It may be less than you think, and then
you’ll be less likely to throw the towel in on your whole goal. 5.
Craving Antidotes. Make a list of at least 10 antidotes you can call forth when
you’re hit with a food craving. Things like: •
re-read your vision •
a picture (from a magazine, drawing, photo, etc.) that captures the feeling and
look of what you want to achieve. (Mine is a woman, about my age and coloring,
in a cool turquoise swimsuit, enjoying the beach!) •
a mantra, or affirmation that calls forth your inner strength and resources. •
activities you can choose instead of eating: For example, a hot bubble bath, an
invigorating walk, call a friend, read a juicy novel. 6.
Get Back In Your Body! That’s right. We often disassociate from our bodies by
turning our attention to analyzing, judging, planning, or otherwise medicating
(with food, drugs, alcohol, and other repetitive thoughts and behaviors) in an
attempt to avoid being present in the everyday struggles of life. The body is an
undeniable reminder of where we’ve been and where we’re headed! It’s our
bodies that show the effects of time, stress, and the choices we’ve made in a
visible and concrete way. So, crafty, adaptable animals that we are, we’ve
learned to escape by “going into our heads,” so to speak. Well, now it’s
time to call yourself back home to your body! Set
aside some quiet time to be alone and undistracted. Check in with your body.
Notice what it feels like to inhabit this body. Ask yourself the following
questions: •
Where does my energy feel sluggish, or stuck? Be specific. Your body knows, if
you give it a chance to “speak.” •
What am I hungry for (other than food; i.e., love, appreciation, justice, etc.),
and how will I choose to get it? •
What food does my body want/need right now? What choice will I make? •
How do I want to feel, in my body? Be as specific as possible. For example, “I
want to feel light in my knees, and free and unencumbered in my lower
abdomen.” 7.
Expect Obstacles And Relapses Now And Then. I promise you, they will happen. But
get the big picture. One little slip up (or even two or three) does not mean
your goal is doomed. Weight fluctuates. Period. Whether you’re trying to lose
or gain, your mostly fluid body will ebb and flow. You are not a victim of your
humanity! You can choose whether to stay stuck, or get back on track. 8.
Take The Scenic Route. I don’t know about you, but for me, I wanted to change
my eating habits for life, and certainly didn’t want to spend my life feeling
deprived. So I decided to consciously choose what I call, “Pauses on the
scenic route,” You know, like when you decide to take longer to get to the
Grand Canyon so you can stop periodically and really soak in the scenery? I
decided to give myself permission to deviate from my eating plan now and then.
My only rules were: •
Enjoy every delectable morsel! •
Make it REALLY good quality and something I really love and want! •
Get right back on the program after I enjoy the “Scenic Lookout” •
No bingeing This
also means I didn’t lose the classic 1.5–2 pounds a week. So what! It means
I am in control, at choice, and not a slave to my (former!) addiction to food.
You can be in control and at choice, too! Connie
de Veer, MFA, CPCC, is a Certified Professional Coach and owner of CdV
Coaching-for Breakthrough Performance. Visit: |
8
Fun & Easy Ways To Love Eating, Lose Weight
