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Fibromyalgia, Aching For Love

By Celia Sue Hecht

Then I read about Dr. Thomas Shinder’s study at the University of Alabama, which confirmed that Fibromyalgia and abuse are related. Dr. Shinder had conducted studies using PET scan technology and demonstrated that there are differences in the area of the Limbic System (or emotional brain) between women with and without Fibromyalgia. There seems to be a higher level of activity in that system in those afflicted with the disease. He says that the changes seen in the PET scan, endorphin and EEG studies could easily be associated with the long-term effects of psychological trauma. He also estimates that up to 90% of women with Fibromyalgia have a history of sexual, physical or emotional abuse.

I soon discovered that I was suffering from posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD). I began to understand why I would often freeze up. I’d want to flee or I’d feel horror and be terror stricken and paralyzed. I exhibited the normal flight, fright or freeze response seemingly at the drop of a hat.

As a metaphysician, I believed there must be something to learn from my illness and I could heal and transmute the pain. One night while flipping channels on TV, I saw my boyfriend from when I was 16. He had become a doctor and was discussing a controversial treatment for MS. I found him on the internet and discovered that he was also doing a study on people with Fibromyalgia.

Step-by-step I found answers to the puzzle and connections between my mind, body, emotions and soul and how they related to fibro. I understood disease occurs on the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual levels simultaneously. In order to fully heal I knew that I needed to heal on each of those levels. Over the following years, I discovered imbalances, unhealthy thoughts and beliefs, and changes I needed to make to sustain me. I found doctors and experts who provided answers and within myself, I continued to ask my guides to help me discover “What message is Fibromyalgia trying to give me?”

After doing an interview with Dr. Lucia Capacchione, author of numerous books about healing with non-dominant handwriting, I did a study of the words “aching” and “cramping” and the messages were astonishingly accurate.

During my research, I learned that Dr Francine Shapiro, a psychologist in Palo Alto, California, had invented a method for healing PTSD called Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing (EMDR). During EMDR sessions, feelings and beliefs can be desensitized, reprocessed, and replaced with alternatives that are more positive and life affirming. The sessions I did seemed miraculous. 

I read Dr. Peter Levine’s book Waking the Tiger, which discusses trauma healing. I found a website called traumahealing.com and started doing classes and sessions with psychotherapist Donna Hamilton who was trained by Dr. Peter Levine, and incorporates an eclectic range of modalities from rebirthing work to Reichian character structure (armoring) into her practice.

At a later point, it was revealed that something was out of kilter with my hypothalamus gland. A study posted on Dr. Jacob Teitelbaum’s website confirmed this. According to Dr. Teitelbaum, people with fibro exhibit hypothalamic dysfunction that doctors don’t know how to treat. The hypothalamus controls many important bodily functions.

I was shown that my body, my soul, and every part of my being was crying out for Love, that my pain wore many symptoms and that all of them masked my disconnection from my Divine Self, my divinity, and God, Goddess, All That Is. My body was simply showing me a reflection of how I was soulfully aching for love.

All along, every step of the way, there has been an abundance of signs, resources and support. I am reminded of that joke, where this guy is stuck on a mountaintop or tall building and God sends him this answer and that answer, but the guy dies waiting for God to come along to save him. When he gets to heaven, he asks, “God, why didn’t you help me?” God says, “I sent you this, that and the other, why didn’t you receive my help?” 

The wisdom and intervention of a foot reflexologist, aromatherapy massage therapist, cranio-sacral therapist, naturopath, psychotherapists, intuitive healer, chiropractor and a health coach were instrumental in helping me heal myself on all levels…physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

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