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A Special Approach To New Year’s Resolutions

by Gala Gorman

As you begin to create your life intentionally, you may wonder, “Why make New Year’s resolutions at all?” My answer is you have to start somewhere. Any day can be New Year’s Day. I urge you to just pick a day and get started. If it isn’t your birthday or the new calendar year, don’t let that hold you back. The real purpose in choosing a starting point is also to choose a measuring point. You need to give yourself and the universe deadlines, a place where you can measure your progress. 

Deadlines are a quick and easy way to measure success. “Did I meet my goals or didn’t I? If not, how much progress have I made and, if I ask for extra time, what do I need to do to make sure I have reached my goals by the next deadline?” So, with the plan of your life, deadlines are as critical to your success, and ultimately to reaching your goals, as they are in any business. This is the business of your life, and you’re the CEO. 

Once you start putting some thought into making resolutions or setting goals, you may wonder, “Why do resolutions fail?” The better question to ask yourself is, “Why do my resolutions fail?” My problem is procrastination, and I’ll bet that’s just about everyone’s problem. Since I believe lazy people wouldn’t even bother making resolutions, I don’t think procrastination is really about laziness. It’s a lot of work to go through the process and arrive at a list of what you want to do, where you want to go, and what changes you are willing to make to get there. Beyond that, you are going to need to take action and do something about it. 

Procrastination is defined as putting off taking action until a future time. In some instances, using that definition, procrastination could be a good thing. When you are not clear about your direction or what your next step should be, then no action should be taken that might send you off in the wrong direction. So, the real reason we procrastinate is that our plan isn’t clear and concise enough. With a well-thought-out and documented plan, you always know what to do next. If you hit a roadblock with the project you’ve been focusing on, you can quickly redirect your energies to another project and continue to make progress on the overall plan of your life, coming back to the other project when you feel you have a green light for the next phase or step. 

As I said, there have been times in my life when I procrastinated. But I was never lacking in motivation. Procrastination, for me, was a function of not having a clearly-defined plan. Even with a plan, you can paralyze yourself by taking on too much. I started out thinking I could dilute my energy enough to accomplish ten major goals in a year. If my goals were not much of a stretch and could be easily attained with a slight alteration in the way I normally lead my life, that might be possible, although I would still question it. My goals, however, are never that simple or easy to attain. I have trained myself to dream big and then go for it. That is what I hope you will do. In that case, three to five major goals are plenty to chew. 

Why? Because you need to build trust and belief in yourself. Throughout your life, there have most likely been times where you have disappointed yourself. You promised yourself you would do or not do something and, presented with the opportunity to prove to yourself what you are made of, you crumbled. The very thing you said you would or wouldn’t do is the very thing you didn’t (or did) do. If you commit to work toward a goal and fail, then all you do is deflate your self-esteem and blow your credibility with yourself, which makes taking the next step even harder. 

So I propose that resolutions fail, not because we are lazy or lack desire, but because we haven’t given ourselves clear direction and have attempted the equivalent of climbing Mt. Everest with two weeks training on the Stairmaster in our local gym. It isn’t realistic to expect to reach your goals or the summit without concentrated training, preparation, and a well-thought-out plan. You need to decide what you will focus on and choose your battles. Once you have, begin to rebuild your trust and credibility with yourself. When you make a commitment, you need to know you will honor it. In other words, make commitments you are completely sure you can meet. One success will build on another and, before you know it, you will be there, with the summit in sight.