Dear Louise

Louise L Hay is a metaphysical teacher and best-selling author of 27 book s including, 
You Can Heal Your Life,  Empowering Women,  Meditations to Heal Your Life,  Letters t o Louise, and The Power Is Within You.

Since beginning her career as a Science of Mind minister in 1981, she has assisted thousands of people in discovering and using the full potential of their own creative powers for personal growth and self-healing.

 Louise’s works have been translated into 25 different languages in 33 countries.

Dear Louise,

I'm so tired of hearing my mother complain about her abusive childhood and how she's finally outlived everyone (meaning her abusive stepfather and her mother, whom she didn't get along with). I try to talk to her about forgiving the past and moving on-and she says she's willing to do that-but whenever we talk on the phone, it's the same old story. She's too resentful to change. My calls to her have become more and more infrequent, which saddens me, but I think it's best I not put myself in the middle of this negative talk. Do you think it's possible to try to change someone else's views about their childhood? I don't seem to be making any headway. - 

D.S., Wichita, KS

Constant complainers seldom realize how boring they are and why we tend to avoid them. You don't need to hear all that negative talk. It's impossible to change anyone unless they truly desire to change. Most people aren't willing to break the habit of living in the past. You've done as much as you can; now just let your mother be.

Let's see what we can do to change your consciousness. For the next month, every time your mother passes through your mind, use the affirmation: I HAVE A DELIGHTFUL RELATIONSHIP WITH MY MOTHER. And say it with a smile on your face! I've witnessed miraculous changes in family relationships using affirmations such as this one.

Dear Louise,

I've recently started reading your book, You Can Heal Your Life, and it is giving me much encouragement. I've suffered from agoraphobia, panic disorders, and depression for 15 years. I've physically withdrawn from tranquilizers, which I've used for 14 years, but I find myself still psychologically and emotionally dependent on them. How can I get past this habit of using pills to calm my anxiety, and rely on my own strength instead?

M.E., Ireland

The strength you're seeking is in your own breath. I have a feeling you've been a shallow breather for many years. When we're tense, we hold our breath, and this creates more tension in our body. From this moment on, I want you to become aware of your breath. Right now, take in a deep breath; fill your lungs; and then let out a long, slow exhalation. You might feel a little lightheaded for a moment because your lungs aren't accustomed to being used to their fullest. Put little notes all over your house saying BREATHE to keep reminding you of this simple healing practice. As many times a day as you can, take three deep breaths. This will heal your anxiety once and for all. You are a powerful lady, and it's time for you to claim your place in life. Affirm: I DESERVE TO TAKE IN THE FULLNESS AND RICHNESS OF LIFE. 

Dear Louise,
I've had chronic back pain for years. Recently I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. If you're familiar with this disease, you know that you hurt all over. I think that a person with this illness is a perfectionist. I know I am. I'm very caring and compassionate, that is, until I fall apart and then struggle to care for myself. It's depressing for me to depend on others to do for me what I want to do for myself. Unfortunately, it is no longer possible, and I feel guilty. I'd appreciate any information you can give me on fibromyalgia and the mind-body connection. 

S.N., Delaware

In your letter, I see a little child who was taught to feel guilty about everything. One or both of your parents probably used guilt to control your behavior. Parents that use this system have no idea of the damage that is done to the child. Anyone who tries to be a perfectionist is doomed to failure. There are too many variables in life. However, "we" are always perfect just as we are, for we are Divine expressions of Life, doing everything in the best way we know how with the understanding and upbringing we have had. So, my dear, take the pressure off yourself.

As I said last month, learn to breathe deeply, fully and slowly.
Allow yourself time to just be. Allow Life to help you in the form of other people. Throw guilt out the window; let it blow away in the breeze.

Fibromyalgia is accompanied by emotional tension reflected in the knotting up of muscles. When a person is under stress, the body reacts and tenses. Stiffness and pain is felt in the fibrous tissues, usually deep within the muscles, yet there is nothing wrong with the muscles themselves. Stiffness is often a result of rigid, stiff thinking. Tension, fear, and holding on result in the body cramping and gripping.

Find a yoga class - it would be very good for you. Teach yourself to relax and use the affirmation: I AM RELAXED AND SAFE. MY MIND IS FLEXIBLE AND PEACEFUL AND SO IS MY BODY. I AM FREE OF PAIN, AND ALL IS WELL.

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