Developing A
Reflective Life In The Midst Of Turmoil
by Asoka Selvarajah
One of the most important things you can do in life
is to simply find time for yourself. By this, we don't mean opting out of
society or "spacing out." Value yourself enough to give yourself
time to simply be, without any expectation of goal or result.
Paradoxically, by doing this, we can often achieve far more in our
externally focused lives than we otherwise might.
When our lives are primarily externally focused, it becomes easy to lose
sight of the game plan. What are we doing all this for? What is the point
of it all? Like too many stressed out corporate "high-fliers,"
we may reach the very top of the ladder, only to find that it is leaning
against the wrong wall. The joy of simply living all too easily evaporates
as we postpone our pleasure for some unspecified future date. We don't
allow ourselves to be happy NOW, but instead promise ourselves that when
we have that promotion, or fallen in love with that ideal partner, or had
that baby, bought that new home, or become a millionaire, THEN we can be
happy. Meanwhile the present time, which in truth is all we ever really
have, quietly slips away.
The biggest trap is to work for money. Many people do this assuming that
once a certain amount of money has been amassed in the bank, or once they
can see the sheer immensity of their assets laid out before them, THEN
they will be truly happy. Again, it is an utter illusion. The truth is you
have to prepare your mindset for wealth first or else (a) you will never
truly achieve it because your inner mind will forever act to keep you
within your comfort zone or, (b) if you do achieve it, you will not have
developed the habits of mind to be content with it anyway.
Tony Robbins tells about how much he wanted to become a millionaire but
once he actually achieved it, the thrill lasted for about ten minutes.
After that, everything felt just the same as before. Yes, there are many
millionaires who are happy. However, there are many who are as equally
miserable. In fact, many of the latter would agree that their prime cause
of sorrow is the money itself; fear of losing it, dissatisfaction at not
being as rich as so-and-so who is worth ten times more, etc. The key point
is that money itself is not the determiner of happiness and purpose. A
correct state of mind IS.
Capturing our purpose is THE most important thing we can possibly do. It
is not the work of a moment, an hour or even of a few days. It is an
ongoing project that brings more riches each and every day. By doing this,
we discover who we really are and why exactly we are here. The truth is
you are here for a purpose. You manifested into this life for a reason. So
how do we go about discovering this purpose?
The first thing is simply to make time for yourself. Treat yourself as
precious and important and find times to be alone in quiet reflection upon
your life. Many people meditate to gain deeper insights about themselves.
This is certainly immensely valuable. However, if you feel uncomfortable
with meditation at this stage, then simply creating moments in the day
when you can ponder and wonder can be deeply beneficial.
At several points in the day, try simply closing your eyes and taking a
deep breath. Turn your attention inward and remember whatever it is you
need to, and as you let your breath out exhale all your tension and
concerns. David Kundtz, in his excellent book, Stopping, calls these brief
moments in the day "Stillpoints." They are easier to do than
meditation because they only take a few seconds. However, if you do about
fifteen or so of these a day, it can make a tremendous difference to your
inner calm and perspective on life.
You can also do what Kundtz calls "Stopovers." These are
slightly longer breaks lasting from several minutes to several hours,
where you take time to specifically do NOTHING. This is important. There
is no agenda. You simply give yourself time to BE. You listen to your body
and what it has to say.
You listen to your inner intuition and gradually develop the ability to
hear its valuable insights. You develop Openness and learn to bypass the
critical part inside you that undermines your efforts to follow your
heart's desire with so-called "realistic" thinking. By giving
yourself more time to simply be and experience your own "beingness"
without preconditions, you gradually awaken to what your soul's purpose
is, one step at a time.
Dr. Asoka Selvarajah is a writer/researcher on
personal development and esoteric spirituality. See his FREE ezine, Aspire
To Wisdom, at: www.aksworld. com/AspireToWisdom.htm?ILTI Asoka welcomes
your questions/comments on this article at his Discussion Forum:
www.aksworld.com/discus?ILTI Visit his Mystic Visions
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